Grandpa Robert J. Ellis passed away in April 2023. Grandma Mary Bay Ellis passed in August 2024. At her funeral I told Tyler that he might not see all these cousins again for a long time.
Not true.
Tyler's Aunt Erika Ellis passed away from endometrial cancer just this past week. We attended her funeral today where we saw many of those same cousins just 7 months ago. Erika stood by her husband Dean (Laura's brother) as he talked about his mom at her funeral. I can vividly recall how tender that was. Little did either know that a month later Erika would be diagnosed and 6 months later we'd be attending her funeral.
She was only 61.
I turned 49 earlier this month.
It's been a very surreal day.
I think part of what made it surreal is that she donated her body to the University of Utah for scientific purposes (love this!) and will then be cremated. So when we walked into the relief society room at the church expecting to see a casket and it wasn't there and there was no interment afterwards, it just felt a little off, a little different, like it was all a dream.
I also think what has made it seem so unreal is that she was active, healthy, in shape. She was a runner, a hiker, a mover. But cancer is impartial and doesn't discriminate. It doesn't care who you are.
I think today has just left me in a more contemplative mood. She had a little time to think about her death and funeral. I haven't thought much about mine other than I told Alex last week at church after he leaned over to tell me that we were singing my favorite hymn How Firm a Foundation that they better sing it at my funeral -- all 7 verses!
What legacy have I left so far?
What legacy am I continuing to leave?
How do I want to be remembered?
Definitely some questions to ponder more deeply.
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