Love languages for children

For Family Home Evening I had the kids take a test to see which love language was most dominate in them (the test is found here; I printed out the PDF version instead of doing it online).

Tyler and I have already taken a similar test. My love language is undeniably ACTS OF SERVICE (scoring 22 out of 27 questions) while Ty's is PHYSICAL TOUCH which just so happens to be my lowest score. In fact the other night we were at a fundraiser dinner and our dinner companions brought up back rubs. They were all a little astounded when I mentioned how I didn't really need them. So for me to really show Ty that I love him, I have to step out of my comfort zone a little. And that's hard to do!

So with some of my kids I could probably guess and get it right as to which love language spoke to them. Nate . . . I was positive Nate would be PHYSICAL TOUCH. He's my child that loves to give hugs. And Erik . . . I was pretty sure he would be GIFTS.

Here's how they scored based on 20 questions:

Kiersten's highest was QUALITY TIME with 6. Her next highest was a tie between ACTS OF SERVICE (4) and GIFTS (4). I wasn't sure what I might get with her.

Erik highest was actually a tie between QUALITY TIME (6) and GIFTS (6) and his second highest was WORDS OF AFFIRMATION (5). I guess I won't be making that kid's bed any time soon. After a little discussion, we all concluded that GIFTS came ahead of quality time. In fact this week Tyler and I pounced on both love languages when we treated Erik, and only Erik, to Arctic Circle for shakes and fries after a botched basketball game due to a miscommunication about the time and place. He was all smiles when I suggested ice cream.

Nathan's highest was WORDS OF AFFIRMATION (7). His lowest was actually PHYSICAL TOUCH. Wow, did I have him pegged wrong. I personally still think he likes hugs. His second highest was QUALITY TIME (5).

Ashlyn was the opposite of Nate with QUALITY TIME as her highest score with 8 and WORDS OF AFFIRMATION coming in second with 6.

Alex was too young to understand what he was supposed to be answering. He was very consistent and chose the last answer. We'll have to do this again with him at a future date.

This was fun and a little eye-opening. It's given me some good ammo when I need to build my kids up and what things I can be doing every day. I found it quite interesting that all of them had QUALITY TIME as either their first or second love language. As I look at that, it's no wonder our kids love Family Home Evening. And I'm serious. We have no trouble pulling our family together for an hour or so each week to discuss family issues, listen to a SHORT lesson, and end with treats. And I guess that would go for our 15 minutes of scripture reading in the mornings also. Rarely, do we not have everyone there and participating.

I think Tyler and I do a pretty good job of spending time with our kids, and not just quality time but in quantity too. We love playing out in the backyard and vacationing together. We enjoy watching a Jazz game together and eating out. In the summer we work together in the yard. We do lunch dates, pulling one of them out of school for an hour. My kids love to play board games and I'm working on trying to like it too (although I'd prefer to just sit and have a read-athon).

Maybe our family motto should be: Work hard and play hard . . . TOGETHER as a family.